Men as victim of Patriarchy

 Everyone would laugh at me if I'll opt for kathak , they will call me a dumb head! They will mock at me!  My parents will say, are you a girl! that you want to dance ?! Don’t defame our family like this!-                    

 - He said hopelessly!

 

 

 

I could feel the immense amount of pressure on him that has been created by categorizing the roles and responsibilities on the basis of gender!

And there are thousands of boys out there who avoid choosing their passion just because it is derogatory according to the society. They avoid to behave, dress up, talk, walk or no matter what that they want to.

Instead they decide to conform with the societal norms to avoid resistance.

 

 

Did you ever wonder that,  how a concept that was made for someone's benefit or to establish their dominance, can engulf themselves? 

 

Let's have a look!

 

Like, a girl child even the boys are subjected to discrimination!! (But it is the least discussed topic.)

 

 

Right from the beginning they are expected not to showcase their emotions , they are asked not to cry like a girl or to be a soft spoken person , instead they should be masculine and always play a dominant role.

(This way the seed of patriarchy is sown since the childhood itself.)

 

 

This suppression of their emotions leads to disaster!  They are never able to vent out their feelings, this tend to develop anger within and leads to cases of violence, harassment etc etc.

 

 

Did you notice that it's not a choice but an obligation to behave in a certain way?!!

They are not even able to express themselves , which is a basic right , which everyone is entitled to!! 

 

 

 

It's quite funny to note that there's sexism in colors as well. The blue boy and pink girl theory is quite impertinent. (I mean now we cannot even choose our favorite colors independently!) 

 

This doesn't end here, this cycle of following the traditional roles is unstoppable !

 

Till he reaches the adolescent stage, his thinking becomes rigid and bifurcation of gender is crystal clear.

If not! then the peer pressure helps him in developing an adamant attitude.

They are always in a mood to challenge each other by saying : 

If you're a man do this! If you're a man do that.! (This type of mindset leads to violence and crime)

 

Rest of the work is done by the sexist parenting. The upbringing is done in such a way that even the slightest things are segregated nicely.

For example: Opt for engineering or any technical field etc as a career option, avoid taking dancing , cooking , fashion etc , it's quite feminine.!

Freedom to opt for a career is also limited to a great extent.!

And then they're expected ONLY to protect their families and earn a living and avoid everything else they want to do!  (Also, expect the other counterpart to be subservient, otherwise it will raise a question on their manhood!!!)

 

 

You must be shocked that , unlike, normal discussions, on gender, how come the other counterpart is being discussed?

Well, that's necessary for balanced thought process.

 

Coming back to the topic!

 

 

Even if they want to grow as an egalitarian person , they're opposed every time.

 

For example, if a man consider that his wife should not be the only one to cook and he should also contribute , then people in his family, his friends etc , starts mocking at him and they think he's not manly enough! He's weak, he's timid! 

 

Have you done the same!? Or think in the same way!? Then it's time to rethink! And develop a more holistic point of view.

But how can we develop that? Is there any way to break the shackles of patriarchal thinking ?

The answer is YES. But it's ONLY possible when we develop a neutral point of view and we are ready to accept liberty and equality as a new normal.

• We need to question every perception of ours which involves , the question of gender.

           For Example : If thoughts like - If I wear a pink shirt today, or If I cry in front of everyone , people                 might regard me as a girl - Needs to be eliminated !

• Its time to support each other in every way possible, encouraging gender neutrality in career options , in our choices, decisions etc is important.

• We as parents, brothers, sisters, friend or for that matter any relation, needs to give a different point of view  , if any situation like this arises. !! 

• This is the time to revamp the upbringing and involve more impartiality in dealing with people around us.

 

Gender equality is not US vs THEM , Its US vs our lack of mutual understanding.

Lets work together and end beliefs that hurts both men and women.

 

Let's observe around and work towards it!

DISCLAIMER : I HAVE JUST DISPLAYED THE OTHER ANGLE OF GENDER INEQUALITY. DON'T MISUNDERSTAND ME AS A BIASED HUMAN BEING. I HAVE CONFINED MY POINTS TO THE TOPIC OF DISCUSSION THAT'S ALL.